The first farmer was a hunter who got sick of hunting and her legs hurt because she was tired of running. Her old man was dead and the children ran away to the ocean. So she took her old man's spear and started drawing lines in the dirt, like the lines on the wall in the caves.
The birds were her spirit guides because they could live in the world between the ground and the sky. The bird songs were the songs the woman would sing while she tilled the dirt with the spear.
The birds would fly over her to see what she was doing and they would defecate on the lines she would drag in the soil. The seeds were planted and the plants from the seeds were from far away from where the birds would live.
That's how the first crops grew.
The children were lost and they cut down all the trees and built canoes and became fishermen.
The woman would see them return with fish and she was upset that they ran away. She took the fish and threw them into the fields and they rotted, but it turned out to be good for the crops and the fields grew and grew. The woman had more children from all the food that was produced and the food was called produce. She produced more children and then they got lost too and found the other lost children.
Some of the children turned into men and they went back to the farm and killed the woman and took all of her food. They went back to hunting and gathering and they gathered more rocks. They threw them at children who disobeyed or tried to make food. They took the bigger rocks and stacked them on top of each other because that's what men could do.
So they went on killing animals and eating them and stacking large stones.
The people who tried to grow crops were burnt to the ground by the men who took the stones to smack them together to create sparks and start fire. The men created fire and rocks and they laughed at the women who made children and food. The men ruled the new world and the children who disobeyed were tortured or thrown off a cliff or sent out to sea.
Then a large meteor ripped through the sky at dusk and destroyed what little there was of people. The leftover animals ate their carcasses and the animals changed over time and became different animals. So much time had passed that there was no one around to remember what those earlier people did. When there were people again, they were running away from terrible beasts who would hunt them down and eat them.
And it was this way back and forth until there was a cold spell.
Then after that it warmed up again. The end.
The end.
The end.
The beginning.
So the meteor wasn't a meteor after all. It was an ice dam somewhere far away. The skies turned dark filled with dust and debris but that was from a volcano. The world as we knew it changed in an instant. Then again it happened already about 40 times over and it took tens of millions of thousands of years. People were impatient and arrogant trying to make sense of what just happened but they couldn't. So they made up things and would pick up a stick and start talking to it like it was a person. And they would put clothes on the stick and give it gifts and sing to it. But it was probably because they were going crazy from the strange new world they were living in. It was a moment that would be remembered and the quickly forgotten.
After that the people walked away to different places and a cold spell swept across what they knew of the world they lived in, the crops failed. But they had failed before they were born and so they didn't care because they wanted to. It was a harsh and unforgiving time filled with trendy attitudes and bad fashion choices. Communities had to band together but instead they picked up the sticks they were talking to and used them against themselves and poked and stabbed one another with the sticks. It was a test of resilience and endurance but eventually they got bored and started making musical instruments from the leftover dead animals.
Then, slowly but surely, there were more people walking around and looking around for things. The ice started to melt and they splashed in the water and splashed other people in the face with the water and said they had to do that because the stick people said they had to and life began to return to the barren lands but it was really slow and generations of people died just sitting around waiting.
It was a sign of hope, a new beginning for some but for many, they just ended up getting devoured by abnormally large and ferocious hyenas and the hyenas would bite the bored people in the face because they felt threatened by the boring people with the faces.
People started to rebuild slowly but half of them were eaten alive by other animals but eventually they were learning from the past and looking forward to a brighter future, meaning fire. They loved fire. Once they controlled fire, then they used it to burn down the forests and kill all the terrible animals who were eating them alive and so fire was good and so we come to the end of our story. A tale of destruction and rebirth, of struggle and triumph, eating, killing, burning and drowning.
The world was forever changed. This is our legacy. A testament to the indomitable spirit and to large massive rocks and boulders and sticks.
